In this faculty perspective, Karl Kuhnert, PhD, professor in the practice of organization and management, explores the often-overlooked leadership transition that occurs when external achievement gives way to questions of meaning and legacy.
We cannot live the afternoon of life according to the program of life’s morning—for what was great in the morning will be little at evening, and what in the morning was true will at evening become a lie.
— Carl Jung
Many high-performing professionals hit a troubling wall somewhere between their late 30s and late 40s. From the outside, life often looks successful:
-You built a career.
-You earned promotions.
-You may have started a family.
-You bought the house.
-You achieved many of the goals society told you should matter.
Despite these achievements, a sense of dissatisfaction can emerge. The strategies that helped you succeed early in life no longer work as well as they once did. Achievement and external validation feel less fulfilling and satisfying. And many begin asking quiet questions they’ve never had to confront before:
-Is this all there is?
-What kind of life am I building?
-Who do I want to become from here?
-Am I making a difference in the lives of others?
-What are others asking of me?
These are not signs of failure. They are signs you are ready for deeper growth.
The First Half of Life: Building a Life
In the first half of life, most of us are focused on adaptation.
We learn how to succeed in the systems around us:
-Get good grades
-Build credentials
-Earn approval
-Get promoted
-Build financial security
-Meet cultural expectations
This stage of life largely seeks meaning externally. We often learn to lead through the strengths that bring early rewards. These identities often serve us well until they become barriers to deeper growth.
When Strengths Become Liabilities
This is where leadership development gets interesting. The same perspective that helped you rise can eventually limit your growth.
-The leader who built their career on being the smartest person in the room may struggle to empower others.
-The highly relational leader who avoids disappointing people may struggle to make hard decisions.
-The achievement-driven leader may realize they’ve built an impressive life that feels strangely hollow.
This is where many leaders begin experiencing what I call a developmental reckoning. Our research on leadership development describes this as the movement from externally defined leadership to self-authored leadership. Or more simply: from leading outside-in → to leading inside-out. This is the transition from Leadership Developmental Level (LDL) 3 to LDL4 within Constructive Developmental Theory (Kegan & Lahey, 2009).
At LDL3, many leaders are heavily influenced by:
-approval
-outside expectations
-image management
-fitting in
-avoiding disapproval
At LDL4, the Self-Authoring level, leaders begin asking:
-What are my values?
-What kind of leader do I need to be to serve others?
-What really matters now?
-How do I resolve this contradiction rather than just pick a side?
This transition is both challenging and essential for evolving leadership.
The Transition Is Often Harder Than People Expect
What makes this transition so difficult is that you are not simply adding new skills—you are often surrendering an identity that once helped you survive. For many people, the second half of life begins when their old strategies stop delivering the meaning they once promised.
-The promotion feels empty.
-The marriage feels distant.
-The children grow independent.
-The achievements feel repetitive.
-The external rewards remain—but internal fulfillment declines.
And then life often introduces what psychologists call a destabilizing event:
-a divorce
-a health scare
-career disappointment
-the death of a parent
-burnout
-betrayal
-an empty nest
-a personal failure that forces self-reflection
These moments can feel deeply unsettling because they challenge the very identity you spent decades building.
Many people respond by working harder, staying busier, buying more things, chasing another title, or distracting themselves from the discomfort. What are your current distractions, and what are they distracting you from?
But eventually the deeper question returns:
- Who am I when proving myself is no longer enough?
This is why the second half of life requires courage.
-You must grieve identities that once served you.
-You must confront values you may have neglected.
-You must redefine success on internal terms.
-And you must build a life based less on external validation and more on meaning, contribution, and purpose.
This is not a clean transition.
It often feels like losing your footing before finding deeper ground.
But for those willing to do the work, it can become the beginning of a far more meaningful and productive life.
Why is this transition so difficult?
Because it often requires loss. You may need to let go of:
-old identities
-outdated ambitions
-external validation
-status-driven definitions of success
-relationships built around pleasing others
That’s difficult work.
Many people try to avoid it by recreating earlier successes with more money or by retiring into comfort, diversions, or endless achievement-chasing.
But growth requires confronting deeper questions.
-What kind of spouse do I want to be?
-What kind of parent?
-What kind of leader?
-What kind of contribution do I want my life to make?
The Shift Toward Legacy
One of the interesting patterns I’ve seen:
Ask many college students to write a legacy statement, and they regularly struggle to connect with the exercise. Ask a 50-year-old executive the same question, and they can spend hours reflecting on it because they have been thinking about it!
Why?
Because maturity changes the questions we ask. As we grow, success becomes less about accumulation and more about contribution. Success becomes less about recognition and more about meaning and less about just showing up. It’s more about giving yourself away in the service of a larger purpose.
Signs You May Be Entering This Transition
-You care less about titles.
-You’re tired of trying to please everyone.
-You’re questioning old definitions of success.
-You want your work to be consistent with your values.
-You think more about contribution than recognition.
-You feel pulled toward purpose, meaning, and legacy.
The Real Risk
The greatest danger is not failure. The real danger is staying psychologically committed to a version of success you’ve already outgrown. Generally, people like change until change means changing themselves. Too many people try to live the second half of life using first-half strategies. Holding on to outdated definitions of success prevents genuine fulfillment.
The Better Question
The question is no longer:
- How do I become more successful?
The transforming question becomes:
- Who must I become to lead the second half of my life well?
The leaders who navigate this transition successfully become more grounded, more values-driven, committed, and more internally anchored. They stop chasing applause. They start building meaning. And in doing so, they often become far better and more mature leaders prepared to lead.
Explore the work of Goizueta Business School’s faculty and discover how their research, expertise, and thought leadership are helping leaders navigate today’s most complex challenges.
Reference:
Kegan, R., & Lahey, L. L. (2009). Immunity to change. Harvard Business Review Press.
